Saturday, January 14, 2006

How to waste thirty minutes...

Today I spent way too long purusing a web-site dedicated to a randomly absurd collection of lists. A few of my favorites:

Things said by the crowd gathering around the Body of Phildippides, Reporter of the Greek Victory Over the Persians at Marathon, Soon After He Gasped, "We Won," and Died.
BY BRIAN HUBBARD

  • "Gosh, he must have run five, six miles. He looks beat."
  • "It seems that, after a clear conscience, the best thing for a man to take on a journey is a little water."
  • "I admire his diction."
  • "Back up. Give him a little room to catch his breath."

Possible First Names for Count Chocula.
BY ADAM SELZER

  • Steve
  • Don
  • Todd
  • Norm
  • Lawrence
  • George
  • Bradley

7 Habits of Highly Successful People.
BY BRENDON LLOYD

  1. Skiing
  2. Yachting
  3. Snorkeling
  4. Golf
  5. Polo
  6. Dinner parties
  7. Shopping

Adjectives Rarely Used by Wine Tasters.
BY ADAM KOFORD

  • Chunky
  • Super-charged
  • Pondy
  • Wine-a-licious
  • Caffeinated
  • Sludgy

Food and Drink Combinations That Would Make a Horrible Afterschool Snack but a Great Buddy Cop Team.
BY LISA SEGER

  • Pickles and Mad Dog
  • Marmite and Everclear
  • Scrapple and Bosco
  • Eggs and Falstaff
  • Salami and Zima
  • Chichirrones and Sangria
  • Skittles and Hot Dog Water

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Bosco: C'mon Scrapple, let's nail him!

Anonymous said...

Jonathan, I think that merlot you brewed up could be described as "pondy"...

Anonymous said...

No offense on that last comment, of course...It was through no fault of your own the "merlot mix" didn't turn out.